Quenchable Thirst

water glassA major part of the human condition is loneliness. It should come as no surprise that every human to ever walk on planet Earth will struggle with and experience the feeling of being lonely. This is something that has been built into us by our Creator; a longing for connection to Him that cannot be satisfied apart from Him. But we regularly try and fail to do so.

I am no stranger to feeling lonely. I have been in a house surrounded  by people and still felt that tingling feeling in my belly that had nothing to do with the bean dip. That hollow, anxious feeling has everything to do with my natural longings for God, and when I seek to fill that thirst with anything but Him I am always left wanting.

The truth is, people are lonely. And I honestly used to believe the only cure for this was marriage. For whatever reason, at a young age, I began looking at marriage as the only answer to the loneliness problem, and I couldn’t  have been more wrong. There are millions of men and women walking around feeling very incomplete, very lonely, and they’ve been married for years. How can  this be? Because they aren’t (we aren’t) seeking God for fulfill our basic needs. We’re trying to do it all on our own, in our own power, and we’re failing miserably.

When people talk about looking to God to meet our human needs, I often roll my eyes. It sounds so super spiritual and so absolutely impossible! How can someone I don’t see fulfill my need for a hug? Is He going to sit with me on my couch and watch Will and Grace? Am I supposed to hold hands with Jesus and walk around the mall picking out China patterns and expect other people NOT to call the police and arrest me for being crazy town? This concept has alluded me for a while, and I have honestly just pushed it to the back of my mind as something super spiritual Christians say to make me feel worse about being single. But today, I realize, there is actual validity in seeking God for every single one of my needs, especially the need to not feel like I am alone.

Consider the Samaritan woman at the well who greets Jesus in John 4. Jesus asks her for water and she is shocked (because of her heritage and the discrimination of her people by the Jews) that he is even talking to her. She tells Jesus of her shock, and his response is what I want us to look at:

(John 4:10-17, NIV)

10 Jesus answered her, “If you knew the gift of God and who it is that asks you for a drink, you would have asked him and he would have given you living water.”

11 “Sir,” the woman said, “you have nothing to draw with and the well is deep. Where can you get this living water? 12 Are you greater than our father Jacob, who gave us the well and drank from it himself, as did also his sons and his livestock?”

13 Jesus answered, “Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.”

15 The woman said to him, “Sir, give me this water so that I won’t get thirstyand have to keep coming here to draw water.”

16 He told her, “Go, call your husband and come back.”

17 “I have no husband,” she replied.

Jesus said to her, “You are right when you say you have no husband. 18 The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.”

First of all, Jesus is always such a G when he speaks in scripture. He never minces words, and he isn’t doing it here either. In so many words, he’s calling this woman out for a sin that many of us (myself included) commit on a daily basis. Look at her track record: she’s been seeking fulfillment and satisfaction from men. She’s been looking for love to meet  her needs and every time (five and counting) she has not found the cure for her deep-rooted, hollow loneliness. And Jesus tells her that if she would just draw water from Him (go to Him for her satiation) she will never ever be thirsty again.

Now, it’s interesting that in our modern culture people call women who appear to be desperate for marriage or a man “thirsty”. I believe this term is accurately used, but not only for women. I actually believe every human, no matter what status in life, is thirsty. We are all desperate for the satisfaction and fulfillment only God can provide, and yet, we look to be filled by our relationship status, our jobs, our friends, our calendars, our skills, and our technology. We are chasing after cup after cup of water that will only continue to make us thirsty. And God is offering Himself as a never-ending well of water for us to drink from daily!

What does this mean for us then? What is the application here?

It means for me that when I am feeling that empty pit in my stomach and I know it’s not a hunger pang, I am going to purpose myself to stop what I am doing and ask God what He wants me to do to satisfy that thirst. This action will happen instead of what I usually do: either wallow in the pain or choose an activity that I think will meet the need. Neither one is helpful and I find myself thirsty all over again.

If we believe God will supply all our needs (Philippians 4:19) then we must also believe that He will show us where and how to get those needs met when we seek Him first (Matthew 6:33). God is capable of telling you when you need to call an old friend or take a nap. He is capable of telling you when you need to read a book or cook a meal for someone. He is capable, in short, of letting you know exactly how to quench the thirst of loneliness. It’s not always  going to be Him saying “Be still”! He knows we need people and socialization! He built us to need and want those things (look at Jesus while he was here on Earth- He was mighty social!) Also, it’s not always going to look like you  think it will. Again, I say, I thought for a very long time that the cure for loneliness was marriage. And I am SO glad God is tearing down that lie and replacing it with truth. Marriage is a beautiful part of life, but not the main event. AND NOT A CURE. (More on this in a separate post).

At any rate, my homework for myself is  to turn to God and ask Him first how to satisfy my loneliness when I am feeling it. And I firmly believe that’s a  thirst He is more than capable of quenching again and again.

All my love,


When I Look Down


I recently posted a blog on taking life one day at a time, and it was great to  get those words out there in the world. It certainly wasn’t a new message to anyone (myself included) but after writing about it, it became more REAL to me.

God is really making sure I get the message on this one, and I am thankful for His persistence in this season (I think…).

I was reminded tonight during a beautiful conversation with a friend about a time back in February when God made the “one day at a time” message clear to me in the visual world. During my conversation tonight, I am so thankful God brought this image back into my mind. I was brought to tears as I remembered how REAL it looks when we walk with God as I personally walked up a Volcano in Guatemala.

Hiking up any incline is difficult, much like life. There isn’t a manual that tells you how to climb properly (much like life) and any one traveler is left to his or own devices as she climbs her way up.

I found myself hiking up Pacaya in February of 2015. I had already made this journey the year before in April, and I had promised myself I wasn’t going to do it again. But alas, my fear of riding a horse up the volcano won, and so I marched my angry butt up the steep incline with bitterness in each step.

It’s funny how annoying it can be when we find ourselves on a journey we didn’t intend to take. Thankfully, I can see from this experience in Guatemala, that God’s plan are far better than ours. They just don’t look as pretty as we imagined.

As I climbed, I started to sweat. Which caused me to get more upset. I realize I had done this once already, so I shouldn’t  have been upset at all. But I was. I was upset I didn’t have the courage to ride the horse. I was upset I had to do physical activity I hadn’t planned on. And mostly, I was upset that everyone else in my group was WAY ahead of me, and I felt like the slow chubby girl waddling her way up the hill shouting ” wait for me!” ( I wasn’t shouting. I was too busy trying to breath).

Interestingly enough, I was never alone on my journey. I FELT alone, but I wasn’t. A man with a horse talked to me for a while before he moved on ahead of me to help someone else. One of my friends stayed behind to make sure everyone made it up to the top, so he made sure his horse moved slower than everyone else’s. I managed to move quicker at some points and caught up with groups of people who were also walking up and not on horses. They each provided me with comfort and support as we were all in the same predicament (whether by choice or chance). And there were also other Guatemalans along the way who either stared at me or spoke. But I was NEVER alone.

And here is the most important part; the lesson that made me cry tonight as I remembered it. When I looked up, and saw how far ahead everyone else seemed, and I saw how far I still needed to travel, I  got so upset. I felt utterly hopeless. And I wanted to cry. But when I looked down and focused on my own two feet and the just the next step I had to take, I felt peace. I felt ease. I felt accomplished.

And that’s exactly what I believe God is calling me to right now: to just focus on my own two feet, on the step that I am on. Because when I look too far ahead, it looks hopeless. And there is just so much more ground I know I need to cover. And there isn’t anything I can do about it from where I am standing.

You know what? I eventually made it to the top of the volcano and joined my group. I wasn’t the last one either! (Some of the girls got distracted with pictures and selfies with their horses and ended up taking longer to get to our end point). But I made it! In my own time, in my own fashion, and I didn’t feel like I had missed ANYTHING by the time I got there. All I felt was satisfaction. Excitement. Accomplishment. Because in  the  end, it did not even matter how long it took me to get to the top: what mattered was that I endured (and sometimes enjoyed) the journey up.

I want to say  the same for my life. In every season (this one especially) that even though the road was rough at times, and the view wasn’t always pretty, I enjoyed the journey.

I AM going to make it to the top. I know it. And I hope I can say (when I get there) that I traveled well.

All my love,

One Day At a Time

I know not what the future holds, but I know who holds the future. -Homer

I am guilty. 

Absolutely guilty.

Completely guilty of wanting to live more than one day at a time.

Anyone else?

I find my brain LOVES to try and tackle days, weeks, months, YEARS even at a time, trying feverishly to figure out and control what will happen in my own strength and by my own means.

This is, absolutely and utterly, insane behavior.

Insane because, what I am currently (and FINALLY) realizing is that I can quite literally only live one day at a  time. I know, a novel idea here! But bear with me as I unpack this, because I believe we are ALL guilty of this insane behavior in one way or another.

For me, I like to know what to expect out of life. I want to set up systems in my day-to-day that provide evidence for what to expect in my week-to-week, which in turn leaves no doubt of how the rest of my days will play out. A pattern of predictability is so attractive to my brain, and yet, as I type this, I could argue that nothing about predictability sounds fun or rewarding.  In fact, what is really exciting about life and this whole human experience is that we do not, in fact, get to pick or plan how our days will play out, and we are called to live instead by faith.

Ah, the most annoying of the f-words: FAITH.

What exactly is God asking of me when His word says to live by faith and not by sight (2 Corinthians 5:7)? My eyes work! What I see makes sense to me! And yet, here He is telling me to live NOT by what I see (not by what makes sense to my humanness) but instead, to live by what I do not see, and trust that He is taking care of the all the details that are currently unclear to my human eyes.

That sounds so contrary to what my body is physically designed for. And as a matter of fact, it is.

God is absolutely asking His children (myself included) to do the things that are not only contrary to our body’s design but also the culture of the world in which we live. The world will regularly tell you to take things at “face value” and believe what you see. But God, the Author and Creator of the Universe, tells us to trust in Him, and everything else will fall into place not only for our good but also to glorify him (Matthew 6:33; Romans 8:28; 1 Corinthians 10:31).

So I waste a lot of time trying to figure out or predict my life. I also expend unnecessary energy, and paint a picture of my future that is not only false, but also ugly. I cannot, in all of my fallibility, display an image of my life that even comes close to the masterpiece God has designed for me. As a matter of fact, I am GLAD God doesn’t allow my thoughts to turn into realities because that life, the one I am afraid of having, wouldn’t glorify Him in any way. In other words, I am glad His ways aren’t my ways, and His thoughts aren’t my thoughts (Isaiah 55:8).

When I meet Him (and I KNOW that day will come) I want nothing more than to rejoice in His goodness, His Grace, His mercy, and His love. And I will. That is one event I can absolutely predict. But right now, it is within my full capability to do all of that TODAY, not having to wait for some future date. I can (and should) rejoice in His goodness TODAY! Because it’s real, and it’s true, and nothing will ever change that. Not my overthinking, not my worry, not my fear: NOTHING.

I can only live one day at a time.

I can bank on the fact that I will meet God one day in Heaven.

Until then…I can enjoy His good gifts and promises one day at a time.

And that is a pattern worth following.

God’s Provision

I type this post from my brand new laptop! Well, it’s new to me!

Last week I posted that I was need of a new laptop as my ancient gem passed away without warning and I found myself desperate to start blogging again. The irony of  timing always baffles me. But, God is never surprised.

My friend Jenny Harwood reached out to me and offered he family’s laptop as a gift, an investment in my writing future, if you will. And I gladly accepted! So this post is in honor of the Harwoods! Thank you Jordan and Jenny!! Your kind and generous gesture has reminded me, in a very difficult time, that God always provides! I am glad you let Him use you this time!

As I mentioned, I find myself in a very difficult time. Sparing details that just don’t need to be shared, I find myself in a stage of life I never thought I would return to. I had images of what my life was going to look like in a year, two years from now, and that cloud of hope and promise has, in a way, vanished. And the person who I imagined would be living that life with me, is gone. And so, my heart is heavy as I type this post. I am not happy. I am not okay. I am not sure what my future now holds. I am, indeed, very sad.

I am having a hard time holding on hope, as it were. I can’t seem to wrap my brain around HOW or WHY  this is happening, and I am not actually sure I ever will (that’s a lie- I WILL I just can’t see it now through the pain). Though I made the decisions that lead me to this place, I am not fully happy with them. I don’t like this kind of loss or pain. I want to remove it. But I know that I can’t. And so here I am.

I am typing from a laptop that wasn’t mine a few hours ago. I didn’t have a laptop a few weeks ago. I am staring at a screen I never knew I would have…but God knew. He knew exactly where I would be, what I would be doing, and how I would feel at this  very moment. And He also sees and knows my future. I do not. if I can be honest, I would tell you my future looks and feel pretty BLEAK right now. But God doesn’t see it that way. And His provision spans far past my pain and limited scope. And I am going to do my best to hold on  to that. It’s just not going to be easy.

This isn’t a pretty post. I may not even be making sense, and I can tell you right now I am certainly not going to go back and edit any mistakes. Let them exist. It’s okay to have mistakes or be wrong or think something that never actually happens. It’s all okay. Because God is bigger than any of it. And I just have to remember that, especially when it doesn’t feel like that could be possible anymore.


The Perfect Picker 

I found myself at a china factory Friday. Crossing over the Ohio state lines into West Virginia, there lives a wonderful colony of misfit plates, cups, and bowls ripe for the picking by the careful and patient shopping crowd. This is a place my mother and aunts travel to at least twice a year: a place where kitchen dreams come true. 

I made the venture on Friday with my aunt. While we were pulling out of her driveway, she ran back inside her home to grab a towel. “We will need this to wipe off the plates.”  I had no clue what I was getting myself into. I just knew I wanted what we were going to shop for: new kitchen items. So we took my WANT and her EXPERIENCE and headed out on an adventure. 

When we got there, I saw bins full of second-hands plates. These plates were deemed “seconds” because of minor flaws in their creation. They had dinks, misprints, coloring errors, fading, bubbles: you name it. Simply put, they weren’t perfect enough to be sold at full price. So customers needed to sift through and find items they would be willing to purchase, flaws and all. 

I began looking through the bowls, plates, cups, and canisters and I realized one very important truth: I didn’t know what made something “good enough” to purchase. And so I started asking my aunt for her expert advice. 

She quickly told me I wasn’t choosing properly; I was accepting too many flaws and I needed to look for some key attributes in the plates in order to avoid buying something I would later regret. So then I started showing her all of the dishes I liked, and she proceeded to tell me “yes” and “no” accordingly. 

This scenario really got me to thinking about how I choose people and activities in life. Am I actively running everything important decision by the expert (in this case, God) or do I simply “add items to my cart” because they look okay and I WANT THEM SO BADLY! 

I think the answer is glaringly clear to me in this moment: and I believe the solution isn’t so difficult to see either. 

In life, there will be many experiences and relationships that I want badly. And many of them will be good and beautiful in the eyes of God and man. But there is sometimes a distinct difference between what I want, what is beautiful and good, and what God desires for my life. And the ONLY WAY to rectify these three to one another is to first turn to my expert and ask (in my lack of wisdom and understanding),

What do you think? Is this a good one to add to my cart?

He will direct me. He will give me wisdom. And most importantly, He will never lead me to add something or someone I will later regret. 

I got a lot of good and beautiful dishes to add to my colorful kitchen. I’m really glad I listened to my expert’s advice. I’ll enjoy those plates better now, knowing I chose in wisdom with the proper help. 
 From my heart to yours,

What Is Legendary Living?

I firmly believe we allow life to get in the way of living sometimes.

If you follow me on Instagram (and you should!) you will begin to notice daily videos popping up with the hashtag #LegendaryLiving. I have checked, and this isn’t a new hashtag by any means, but it is new and important to me, so I think I should give a little explaination about this new relationship I am entering into.

For me, I sometimes find it’s easy to put life on hold. We press pause with our dreams regulary, for any number of reasons. You haev a huge deadline at work and you can’t keep working on your short story at home. You have a major life-changing event occur, and your crochet hobby falls by the side of your night stand. You’re tired from life, so anything that takes extra energy gets pushed to the back of your mind and your plate. Leaving a long list of to-do’s in life that often become don’ts.

I am sure you can relate to this on some level, in some way! We all have goals or aspirations that have yet to be fully realized.

And sometimes, that’s okay. Sometimes, we aren’t meant to scale mountains or pen novellas. But what is often the case, I firmly believe, is that we allow life to get in the way of living, and some days, weeks, months, years get wasted because of that simple truth.

So, legendary living is simply living on purpose. Choosing every single day that no matter what, you will live on purpose, for a purpose, thus leaving behind your own legacy. In other words, choosing to create your own legendary tale, one page at a time, instead of letting life write its own version for you.

I believe every person was created by God, the God of the Bible. I believe that very God wrote purpose on the hearts of all of His creation, and that purpose burns through us all in our thoughts, our skllls, and our deepest desires. I know for sure many voids exist on this planet because of people who haven’t and aren’t living on purpose, people who are casually choosing the opposite of Legendary Living, myself included.

I realize there is only one me on this planet: no other Danni Tabor who specifically possesses my talents, passions, gifts, or character.  The same is true for you!

Legendary Living is a choice, and I am going to start choosing it daily. I want to have a say in how my story plays out, and that starts with my choices each day.

All my love,


Do You Like The Company You Keep?

I firmly believe we are called to have fellowship and relationship with other humans. We were not created to live life or do life alone. However, it’s very important to understand the key difference between needing people, and NEEDING people. I know, it sounds like I just repeated the same words, but I promise the emphasis matters!

Needing people, in a healthy and godly way, is biblicaly mandated, and orchestrated beautifully by Christ himself.

John 15:12-15 “This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you.”

Jesus, the only righteous (and might I add WHOLE) person to ever walk this planet understood the need for friends and fellowship. He himself had friends, close personal companions with whom he shared his life. It is no mistake that Christ identified with the very human need for companionship: it is God’s design for our lives.
Often, because we have been emotionally hurt by people and scars don’t easily fade, we can find ourselves denying the need for human interaction. This can look one of two ways: isolation or obsession. It is easy to isolate from society when even one person has hurt you: trust me, I know! I recall several different seasons in my life where I threw myself into books or television, shunning my phone, shunning my friends, and turning my back on the world, only to find I was even more hurt in the process. I have also encountered seasons of obsession: times where I have been longing for and obsessed with friendship or relationship, only to be left wanting and feeling empty for the lack that I felt.
And that obsession, that emptiness, THAT is the difference between needing and NEEDING. When we look to other people to compliment and add to our lives, we recognize a need to not experience life alone. When we look to other people to complete and validate our lives, that is when we are operating in unhealthy NEED, and in danger of causing more pain for ourselves than good.
Something to think about: when you’re sitting alone on your couch, do you feel calm or anxious? When it’s Friday night and you don’t have plans with anyone, do you feel at rest or restless? In other words, when you have moments of quiet, when you’re alone with yourself, do you like the company you keep, or do you feel you NEED someone else to make your moments worthwhile? Because ultimately, your relationship with yourself is the one you’ll be walking in the longest, and if you’re not content with that company, who can anyone else fill that void?
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Until next time, I send my love!