Found this on my cellphone

I was scrolling through the notes in my phone today and I found this. I’m so glad I write things down when I can, because this reminder from my past-self is right on time. 🙂

And hopefully for you as well! Enjoy.

1/7/13
Read psalm 33 tonight and it really hit me that my marriage will not be sustained by my power, and it can’t be formed by my power. There is nothing within my strength that can cause my marriage to miraculously be. I can simply go about The Lord’s work and be obedient, even in times of pain and confusion. I must simply be obedient to The Master and Creator. It is only by His breath and words that my situation can change. It is only by the prompting of God that I may be married. I don’t have any control over when that happens. And that’s a bit scary.
But Lord, I humble myself before you and admit that I have been wrong to think I could do anything better than you. Forgive me my pride and my haste. Forgive me my whining and my self pity. Provide for me more opportunity to sing and use my talents, Lord. Help me to focus my attention on that which is important to you. Help me to become-as women say- so involved in serving You that I don’t even notice a man until its too late- he’s my divinely appointed husband. Help my brain to rest. Help me to not try and figure everything out all the time. Help me to sit at your feet and listen. I have trouble listening, lord. I need your help!

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Tiffany

Today I would like to take a minute to pay tribute to someone who changed my life: my dear friend Tiffany.

 

I met Tiffany at a very difficult time in both of our lives; she was dealing with family issues while I was questioning my purpose in life. We were in the same sorority in college, and eventually found ourselves as roommates in the sorority house. I found myself often feeling lonely in a house of 54 other girls, which is ironic to say the least. One of my sources of hope at this time in life was my friendship with Tiffany. She truly was a wonderful young woman who enjoyed having fun, and who wasn’t afraid to be herself. 

 

I left Ohio University in the middle of my junior year to move back home. Tiffany stayed there, but we kept in close contact. Over the years. I found myself at a very low point in life. I was in a relationship with someone who was toxic, and I was struggling to financially stay afloat. To think on this time now, I would refer to it as my very own “dark ages” (perhaps because my electricity got shut off on numerous occasions). But thing I do remember from this time is the phone calls of encouragement I would get from my friend Tiffany. 

At this point in her life, Tiffany had reestablished her relationship with the Lord, and her joy was evident in every word she uttered over the phone. I remember that simply hearing her voice made me feel better. On one of our phone calls she recommended to me that I read a book by Rick Warren, The Purposed Driven Life. I was hesitant to read a biblical-based book as my own experience with the church had tainted my view of spirituality, but for whatever reason, I bought it. I trusted my friend, even if I still felt wounded by the church.

 

That book utterly changed my life. I am 100% certain that I am walking with the Lord today because of that book. And I would not have known about it unless my dear friend shared her faith with me.

 

Tiffany, I have so much to thank you for! Thank you for speaking truth into my life in several difficult times. Thank you for being a positive memory for me in times that were quite negative. Thank you for loving me unconditionally, especially when I don’t call for long periods of time! Thank you for thinking highly of me, and for being a person who I continually think of as a shining light.

 

I am so proud to call you my friend, and I can’t wait to celebrate your graduation this year! Even if I am not able to be there, I am celebrating with you, my friend!

 

You deserve all of the goodness and LOVE God has to offer.

 

I love you!  

Sara

As a part of iLoveFriends month, I’ve decided to use my talent to show love to some special people in my life. I was praying about little ways to show that I care, but money is very (Lord-oh-so-very) tight these days. My words, however, are free.

Today I want to take a moment to speak very highly (and honestly) about a woman who has been my friend since ninth grade: Ms. Sara.

Having transferred from catholic school (which I attending from pre-school through 8th grade) to high school was scary for me. I questioned the safety, the academic challenge, and the fashion. No uniforms? What was I to wear? Mostly though, I questioned who in the world would I spend my time with? My friends were all going to the catholic high school, and I was being thrust into a world of gangs and hand guns (note over dramatics here).

As luck would have it, I met two very awesome ladies within the first few weeks of school. And on the day I was singing the national anthem at the school’s basketball game, we made plans to hang out! I was so excited to have actually made high school friends!

That night- their parents were late picking me up and I ended up having to walk to the game. But we met up there, and (thankfully) they wanted to grab food after the game. Being freshmen, we were joyfully carted around by parents whenever we needed to go somewhere, and I remember thinking that the music being played in the car (rock) was scary, but the company was awesome!

That night I began an amazing friendship with Sara, and I don’t remember a time in my life without her.

She was there through the AP paper, the drama plays, the speech tournaments. She was there through the proms, the kisses at lockers (boys of course), the mischievous plans to sneak out at night. She was there through the midget house runs, the “never surrenders”, and the “bag it up”s. Sara was there when we went to Ohio University (she actually stayed- I left foolishly junior year). She was there through the sorority parties, the Halloweens, and the fake IDs(I didn’t have one, of course). She was there through the Women studies classes, the black woman class I skipped, and the tests we crammed for.

She was there when we graduated and lived back in our hometown. When I moved to Florida she supported my decision and loved me, even though she has yet to “love” any of my boyfriend choices.

She watched me grow into a teacher, and then a bible graduate student. Sara respected my beliefs in God and gave me room to freely hash out what I think to be true and self evident. She agrees with me when I say I think I’m called to share the Word of God, and doesn’t blink when thinking about my not-so-shiny past. She even honored me by having me in her wedding.

And now, Sara is there for the phone calls that seem to last for hours, but happen way too infrequently. She is there for every visit I make back home to Ohio, greeting me with a hug and a few good stories. In short, Sara has been and still is there for me. That’s invaluable, to say the least.

She is, by far, one of my favorite people on the planet. When I thank God for my friends, she instantly comes to my mind. She’s an old soul with a young mind, and her heart is genuine and beautiful. She is someone I love having on “my team” and a woman who makes me want to be a stronger woman every time I hear her voice.

Sara- I absolutely love and adore you.

Thank you for being my friend!

Pro-vision

I am learning more and more that what I lack in the natural, God can (and will) provide in the spiritual. Man, oh man!

My God has provided!

It was brought to my attention today that though I lack a husband, I have three close friends whose husbands came to my “rescue” over the past month. People who love me care about me; I have a wonderful spiritual family who cares about my safety, my well-being, and me!

And instead of spending time worrying about what I lack, I’ve been thinking about all that I have not had to go without. That list is short. Very short.

I’ve got pro-vision: a positive outlook on what my God has provide.

And you know what?

The view is good, even if my husband isn’t in it….yet =)

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