Humbling Hurts

It’s absolutely painful to be placed in the middle of a humbling experience. It’s my own fault; I prayed for this.

I know what you’re thinking: who prays for pain? Well, if you read and study your Word, you know that God calls us to constantly seek His Will and not our own. This Will of God, the God I serve, doesn’t always put me in comfortable situations. As a matter of fact, I have been in more awkward, painful, nasty situations as a believer in Christ than I ever was as a person of the world. In short, following God can be a painful (sometimes bloody) journey.

I am forced to think about a few recent situations in my life (some of which I am still walking through) in which God has called me to be humbled and brought down to a level of truth, where I am NOT “miss thang.”

One such situation happened Friday when I opened my mouth at work and spoke hurtful words to some of my colleagues. I spoke out of anger, fully motivated by my foolish pride, and I regretted what I said instantly. I immediately apologized for my words, but the damage was done. God used this situation to teach me that I don’t know and can’t do anything void of Him. In knowing this, and also learning it continually, I have decided to change the way that I interact with people. If I am imperfect, that means that others are too. If others are imperfect, their judgment of me shouldn’t carry so much weight. In the same manner, my judgment of others shouldn’t happen so regularly, since my imperfect behind is no better than anyone.

Another situation has to do with one of my classes. In short, I think I can teach the class. I even thought about dropping it so I could be present at worship team practice, since I would rather be there. However, God had to reveal to me that this is a test. I have to stick it out; I have to attend every class; I have to respect the authority in charge of the class, as that is the person God has placed in that position and not me. And, though my desires for being present at worship practice on Thursday nights are valid and justified, I have to prove to God that I am willing to cast down my desires to meet His.

This whole growing process is painful and annoying. But, it must be said that the rewards and benefits to following God cannot even be matched by the trials and pains. It’s worth it. It’s all worth it, and for this reason, I can count it all joy because I am trying my best to do what I feel God has called me to do. Last night I thanked God for the pain and the hurtful situations I’ve been in. I think that was the first time I truly understood what it means to “praise Him through the storm.”

It’s raining, but I think I will dance in the drops…

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I am a 32 year old teacher in Georgia, originally from Ohio (Go Buckeyes!). I am also a singer and I recently taught myself how to play guitar. For fun, I enjoy reading and lots of Netflix binges, which is my American right! I have also been known to cycle, run half marathons, and do just about whatever I set my mind to. A charming shepherd-mix dog named Kingsley lives with me and keeps me laughing at his antics at every turn. I am learning how to love the life I live with each passing day. Sometimes it's easy...other times, I write about it.

One thought on “Humbling Hurts”

  1. This was very encouraging. I appreciate your your transparency, and I continue to remember you in my prayers. It’s amazing that something so “imperfect” can be so awesome! Love ya! -Rik Reed

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